Archie Sonic Issue #16

YES! Way to go, Dave! THAT is how you do an effective (and fully original, sorry Issue 9) comic book cover! It's relevant to the issue at hand, it's an incredibly striking image that instantly catches your attention, all the characters are drawn well, Robotnik is suitably menacing for a change... you FINALLY nailed one of these! Sure, the corner box gag is kinda lame, and there's some word bubbles that don't need to be here, but still, well done! I knew you had it in you!

And speaking of victories that have been LONG overdue by now, we finally have Sally in her proper SatAM character design... aside from a couple of issues of inconsistency at first regarding her iconic blue jacket being present, but ahhhh, details, details. Let's just be happy about the progress we HAVE made and not let the little things get to us. It'll all work itself out soon, you'll see.

Anyway, this issue marks a rather notable turning point for the comic, for 2 reasons. The first, more mundane one is that after most of the last 5 issues briefly experimented with trying to haphazardly juggle 3 stories at once each, this issue officially kills that idea dead (save for special issues, which are longer and actually have the space to accommodate them). GOOD. And the second reason, as I alluded to last time, is... this is our very first confirmed instance in Archie Sonic history of an entire issue written by none other than Ken-

-Hey, calm down! I was going to say Ken Penders AND Mike Kanterovich, or did you forget about Mike already? And what did I tell you before? Not everything Penders writes in the early days is bad! He's still confining himself to the Gag Era, he's got a partner keeping him in check for the most part, and spoilers, there's not a cringe failed attempt at feminism in sight this time. It's going to be fine, I promise.

Without further ado, let's jump right into it, starting with:

"Sonic Under Glass!" (insert bad Underground theme song parody joke here)

Alright, lots to talk about just on this first page here. 

For starters, we've got Dave Manak on pencils once again, this time for the entire issue, and I think this top panel here is a perfect example of the incredibly mixed bag that is his art style at this point in time. On the one hand, it seems like he's finally got the characters down to an exact science, which is doubly impressive given this is his first time drawing actual, real, lore accurate Sally Acorn. On the other hand, MAN his background details need some work. That tiny little shot of fire over a few rectangles that's meant to represent all of Robotropolis burning is underwhelming to a shocking degree, and the bland mountainside right next door doesn't help matters either. 

And that leads us naturally into the second point, which is WHOA ROBOTROPOLIS IS GONE!? They... they did it, just like that!? Huh!?

Seriously, what an absolute bombshell to start a story off with, especially in THIS era. Genuine props to Mike and Ken both here, this is a fantastic way to grab the reader's attention and totally disorient them right out of the gate. Instantly, I want to know more and figure out what's happening, because something is clearly amiss here. Good start.

Third, and finally... goodness, Sonic's quip when they're taking that photo gives me serious war flashbacks to every get together ever with my mom's side of the family. She and her parents were OBSESSED with getting as many photos of everyone as humanly possible, and my older brother would always, without fail, find some way to troll them and mess it up over and over for his own amusement while I'm sitting here like "JUST LET THEM TAKE THE STUPID PICTURE SO I CAN GET BACK TO MY LIFE, PLEASE!" I love my family, but good grief that whole ordeal was exhausting every single time.

After another page showing "6 months pass" (with a not-so-subtle hint that this timeline isn't quite right) and a supposed wedding between Sonic and Sally (seriously, what is WITH the Gag Era making their "secret love" so dang obvious!?), we thankfully get the answer to what's really going on here relatively quickly by Penders's future standards:

Yes, as it turns out, this whole thing is nothing more than a fake dream world constructed out of Robotnik's latest machine after he successfully tricked literally all of the Freedom Fighters into arriving at the same place for free chili dogs even though you would think only Sonic and MAYBE Tails would be invested in that. I would complain about this, but I'm honestly just amazed to be reviewing a comic book referencing "Sleepy Hollow" at the exact time of year where I typically watch Disney's rendition of that old tale for Spooky Season. What a fantastic coincidence that is.

No, but seriously, before we continue, do yourself a favor and listen to the absolute BOP that is the Headless Horseman song from that short right here, right now. I may never get a better opportunity than this to expose more people to this catchy, creepy classic on this blog.

NEVER gets old, man. 

Anyway, this plot point is... well, it isn't exactly some crazy, world-shattering concept that's never been done before or anything, but that doesn't mean it's a BAD story premise, either. It's a fairly decent setup for some interesting character drama, so much so that there exist stories with their own spin on this for both of DC's golden boys Superman AND Batman. In fact, given Penders's previously established love of superhero comics, I wouldn't be all too surprised if one of those stories gave him and Kanterovich the inspiration for THIS story. 

For Superman, there's the old Alan Moore storyline, "For The Man Who Has Everything", later adapted into an episode of Justice League Unlimited, which features a reality where Krypton was never destroyed, and Superman lives a normal life with a wife and kids, which he has to give up in order to continue being DC's paragon of justice. I haven't actually read or seen either version, but I've heard whichever you look into is a gut-wrenching masterpiece.

On Batman's end, we have "Perchance To Dream" from the Animated Series, which I HAVE watched, which has the Mad Hatter place Bruce Wayne in a world where his parents are alive, he's engaged to Selina Kyle, and the real kicker, SOMEONE ELSE IS BATMAN so he doesn't have to feel guilty for abandoning anyone in need. If I had to place a bet, I would guess that THIS one in particular is where Ken got his inspiration from, both because of how it's set up by a machine and, as we'll see in just a minute, the illusion falls apart once the hero starts seeing certain discrepancies with the world that simply can't be handwaved away.

 This scene is SO devastating in context. Bruce was SO READY to accept this new reality, and then it all shatters in seconds. I honestly don't know if I've ever pitied the man more in my LIFE.

I probably don't have to tell you that this story isn't going to come anywhere near the quality of those 2 titans, but to give as much credit as I can to someone like Ken Penders, the execution here isn't too bad, all things considered. To give you an idea, let's get back on track as Robotnik finishes his grand monologue here...

Wait, hold up, why is that bottom left panel actually really good? Like, no joke, that's... that's actually a pretty solid villain line for Robotnik.

"My dream of a perfected ordered society shall come to pass... save for that piece of chaos under glass."

Am I crazy? Did KEN PENDERS write a legitimately good line of dialogue? This... this HAS to be Kanterovich's doing... right?

But yeah, we cut back to the dream world, and just as it seems Robotnik's got Sonic completely on the ropes, some cracks in the digital reality begin to show pretty quickly:

"Ah, welcome back! You may have noticed that this room has begun to deteriorate as a result of narrative contradiction."

First, there's Antoine stealing Sonic's spot in his own wedding, which isn't directly explained but does make sense when you think about it. After all, if this place is an amalgamation of EVERYONE'S desires, it tracks that Sonic and Antoine having the exact same wish would complicate things. 

Second, Uncle Chuck and Muttski are magically back to normal, which is certainly something Sonic desires above all else, but he knows can't just be gifted to him on a silver platter. If the first error didn't clue him in, this one certainly does the trick.

Third, uh... melting clocks? Because... Gag Era nonsense, I guess? Oh well, 2 out of 3 ain't bad.

All of this craziness is more than enough to grab Sonic's attention and convince him this world isn't all that it seems (although I feel like Sally should have been clued in as well when she literally fell through a hole in the floor but whatever). After a decent gag of using Robotnik's "user-friendly technology" inside the dream world to get "free, easy answers" from the fake Chuck, Sonic then takes this newfound resource to ludicrously overpowered levels, hijacking all of Robotnik's machines in the real world and threatening to destroy Robotropolis if the doctor doesn't release the Freedom Fighters from their prison.

Also, Al and Cal show up for some reason.

Yeah, I have no idea what they're doing here. They're supposed to be in their own pocket dimension, and I sincerely doubt any of the Freedom Fighters' deepest desire is for them to show up here, especially since only Sonic has met them thus far. My only guess, since Manak is penciling, is that he threw them in for a gag, which... again, why?

But whatever, Robotnik dumps the Freedom Fighters out and regains control of his city as they all flee. Alright, the stakes are dying down now, I'm sure it's time to end it on some silly pun or goofy visual-

-NOPE! In a stunning twist, we actually end on a serious, dramatic note for a change! We're given a cruel reminder that Uncle Chuck and Muttski are still roboticized (with Uncle Chuck FINALLY being portrayed as a proper Robian, HALLELUJAH!), and Sonic making a determined declaration that he WILL get them back some day, no matter what!

And actually, come to think of it, that final note DOES make this story unique to the others I compared it to in a pretty significant way. Where Batman and Superman's tragedies have already occurred and can't be undone, Sonic's has also already occurred, but there remains a path to undoing it by saving the world from Robotnik! Again, it's not some incredible new insight or anything, but still, it DOES stand on its own in this regard and makes for a solid demonstration of the kind of determined hero Sonic is.

See, what did I tell you before? We've just gotten through the first story, and not only did we survive without any serious cringe... I... actually think that's in the running for best story in the book so far. I'm not kidding! It was a little fast-paced, and some Gag Era silliness slipped through here and there, but overall, this one was leaps and bounds ahead of most of its contemporaries. There was actual drama! Robotnik's plan was insane, but in a way that heightened how evil he is without making him look like a total doofus! Sonic is actually taking things seriously!

This is exactly what I was talking about back in Issue 11. Did Ken Penders do some insanely questionable things, both as a writer and just in general as a person? Absolutely. In fact, we already examined an early instance of that just 2 issues ago, and I gave it the verbal beatdown that I felt it deserved. But did he also bring some positive changes that allowed Archie Sonic to become more than a simple, forgettable, episodic gag comic? Absolutely. And just as I attack his inexcusably terrible material, I will also give the man praise whenever it is due. This is certainly one of those times.

 

But of course, we still have one more story to get through, which begs the million-dollar question: can Ken and his buddy Mike actually go 2 for 2 and give us a full, solid issue? Let's find out with:

"The Man From H.E.D.G.E.H.O.G."... DID KEN PREDICT E.G.G.M.A.N. TOO!? Genuinely how has he not already threatened to sue SA2 already, given his track record!? This is insane!

So, this story starts off with a fairly intriguing premise. Robotnik is frustrated at how often it seems like Sonic is aware of whatever plan he has next and believes there to be a mole in their organization. I mean, literally the last story we just looked at contradicts that pattern, but alright Ken, let's see where this-

... He... he finds... a LITERAL mole, to help him track down the... FIGURATIVE mole? I... THINK that's the joke? 

Yup, back to the usual Gag Era shenanigans, it would seem. Although I did chuckle a LITTLE for just how on-the-nose it was, so I guess I'll give Penders and Kanterovich half points on that.

Robotnik asks the mole "WHO is the head of the secret intelligence" to which he simply replies "that's right", leaving Robotnik utterly bewildered and thinking this guy has no clue what's going on. I'm sure you've already figured out the obvious naming convention twist here, but I'm no dummy. This mole is lying! Who's on first, What's on second, and I Don't Know is on third! You really thought you could sneak that one past me? Nice try, wise guy!

                                  Truly one of the greatest comedy bits ever written. 10/10, no notes.

In an effort to negate the mysterious spy's efforts, Robotnik sets up a new "Wheel of Misfortune" (which is trademarked, a fun little quirk that's totally in character for him) that will make his plans completely and utterly unpredictable so Sonic can't find out what he's up to and stop him in time. On paper, that's not a bad concept, but I can't help but wonder about some of the logistics here, especially with what these schemes end up boiling down to. As we can see here, the first one is an "underwater bank heist" courtesy of Coconuts, which... why is there an underwater bank in the middle of nowhere? What does robbing it accomplish in the grand scheme of things? The second one, a museum heist from Scratch and Grounder (man, early Penders stories love the S6 Squad for some reason) runs into these same problems. Didn't this guy take over the planet? Why is there a random museum out in the open?

That said, the third scheme... well, it's something else, that's for sure:

I won't lie, reading the words "Mindless Act of Terrorism" paired with the image of robots setting up a bomb in the middle of the Great Forest was so over-the-top bonkers that I can't even be mad. This isn't the special brand of Penders crazy to add to the counter, this is just good old fashioned dark humor. 

But of course, each and every one of these schemes falls apart as usual, with the Freedom Fighters continuing to be one step ahead at every turn and the "mysterious spy" leaving "cryptic" notes everywhere (yes, I'm using those quotes sarcastically). Robotnik, fed up with his schemes starting to quite literally blow up in his face, decides to forego the wheel in favor of a more traditional scheme...

Yes, that's right, folks. We're back in Casino Night once again... or the weird Archie version that's less fun and more like a typical casino. 

Now, why do I find this detail so... FASCINATING? Well, you'll just be STUNNED to know it has to do with Penders once again. See, a common thing I've seen over the years is that whenever someone directly confronts him online criticizing his work, specifically in regards to the many contradictions between him and other Archie writers at the time he was there, one of his most common deflection tactics is to simply say, "I never read any of their work". And yet, here we are, 6 issues into his run, ALREADY referencing a location established by a previous writer, Mike Gallagher to be exact.

Of course, you could argue that Penders DIDN'T know about Casino Night exactly, since he never uses the name in this story and it functions like any other casino. You could argue that Manak saw the script and ASSUMED it was the Archie Casino Night Zone, given Robotnik is running it... just like Archie's Casino Night Zone... and it's a regular old casino... like... Archie's Casino Night Zone...

Fine, I'll just spell it out: I have never bought that excuse. For one thing, it literally CAN'T be true when it comes to the Gag Era, because Penders has openly admitted to the fact that his son bought the older comics and made him familiar with the character enough to start writing for the book. So, like, he HAD to have read SOMETHING. That's just basic math right there.

And I already see you typing "maybe he just meant the later work with Karl Bollers!", which... nah, I still don't buy it. Let's ignore that the 2 of them HAD to collaborate on the Adventure adaptation and just look at the general facts of the case here. Even if what Penders is saying is true, and he never directly read Bollers's stuff, there are simply TOO many references/direct connections between his and Bollers's stories for him to not at least be AWARE of what Karl was writing. It happens so often that by the time I'm done combing through them all, it'll be quite the heaping mountain of evidence to contradict such an absurd claim. 

But I'm getting WAY ahead of myself once again (check that off your bingo cards for "typical behavior in one of Daniel T's reviews", I guess). Right now, it's still the Gag Era, and he's actually doing relatively decent work this issue, so let's be nice about this while we can.

...OK, on second thought, let me be mean about it just a LITTLE bit here. Hmm, Sonic is gambling with a "robot owl", who hands him a card telling him to duck just in time for an incoming attack. Gee, I wonder who our secret spy could possibly be? Truly a suspenseful mystery story for the ages.

In fairness, you can see this guy popping up all over the story, including when the wheel was first wheeled into Robotnik's office. That is admittedly a nice touch that perfectly explains exactly how the Freedom Fighters have known what's up all along, even if the spy's identity is the most obvious thing in the world.

Speaking of obvious, Sonic is now 2 for 2 in this casino in terms of falling for Robotnik's blatant, in-your-face traps. Take the hint, man, no wonder you need a spy to tell you these things.

Honestly, there isn't much else that happens after that. Sonic is briefly captured and put on the Wheel of Misfortune, but Robotnik is sabotaged and Sonic escapes completely undetected. We then get the answer to the greatest mystery of our modern times, and learn the name of our spy...

HARVEY WHO. Today, a simple punchline to a silly little joke. But later... ooooooh boy, this guy. This absolute LEGEND. To say that Ian Flynn gives this one-off gag character a serious narrative glow-up would be drastically underselling it. It will be a VERY long time before we see him again, as in, a full 200+ issues WITHOUT counting spin-offs, but when he does show up...

Secret Freedom is SO GOOD, you guys don't even know. Genuinely peak Sonic content, and I am NOT joking around. When I say that, I MEAN IT. 

But yeah, that's a wrap on this issue. The second story was definitely much weaker and fell into a lot of Gag Era trappings... but honestly? That first story was so far ahead of the usual nonsense that I think it's more than enough to carry the whole issue straight to the top of the list, with its only contender being MAYBE Issue 13 for Knuckles, but... I dunno, I think even then, this one takes it. Really solid work from Mike and Ken this time.

Tune in next time when Sonic gets into a brawl with a giant, robotic King Kong... and Sally discovers something that will change her life forever...